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Telehealth · Anywhere in Texas

Stop wishing you felt like yourself.
Start feeling like it.

Two ways to start with HOOT HRT. Both include your ongoing visits, follow-up labs, medication, supplies, and direct clinician access. The initial lab panel plus provider evaluation is $350, billed separately. The first consultation is complimentary.

PA-C & MD, Texas licensed   ·   Prices published   ·   Cancel any time

“I don’t want anybody wishing they had a great life, great health, and a great sex life. I want them to have it.”Joe Hamm, PA-C · Founder

Start here · 90 days

HOOT 90

$725
Everything included for 90 days. Nothing auto-renews.
  • Your initial evaluation and full baseline panel
  • 90 days of medication and every supply, shipped to you
  • Week-six recheck labs and a dose-in visit
  • Message your clinician directly the whole time
  • Continue, pause, or walk away at day 90
Start with 90 days
Most patients choose this

The Annual Membership

$208.00
/ billed monthly
Best value · $2,500 for the year
  • Up to four provider visits across the year
  • Three comprehensive panels, including A1c and PSA
  • A full year of medication and supplies, shipped
  • Unlimited dose adjustment — we keep working until it's right
  • Direct clinician access between every visit
  • No contract. Cancel any time.
Book a free consultation
Two ways in

Start with 90 days, or choose the annual membership.

Choose the option that fits where you are right now. Neither path locks you into anything.
  • 90 Day Reset — one time · 90 days $725
  • Annual membership $2,500
  • Annual Membership billed monthly $208/mo
Initial lab panel plus provider evaluation is $350, billed separately. The first consultation is complimentary.
Start here · 90 days

HOOT 90

$780
Everything included for 90 days. Nothing auto-renews.
  • Your initial evaluation and full baseline panel
  • 90 days of medication and every supply, shipped to you
  • Week-six recheck labs and a dose-in visit
  • Message your clinician directly the whole time
  • Continue, pause, or walk away at day 90
Start with 90 days
Most patients choose this

The Annual Membership

$250.00
/ billed monthly
Best value · $3,000 for the year
  • Up to four provider visits across the year
  • Three comprehensive panels, including A1c and LH/FSH
  • A full year of medication and supplies, shipped
  • Unlimited dose adjustment — we keep working until it's right
  • Direct clinician access between every visit
  • No contract. Cancel any time.
Book a free consultation
Two ways in

Start with 90 days, or choose the annual membership.

Choose the option that fits where you are right now. Neither path locks you into anything.
  • 90 Day Reset — one time · 90 days $780
  • Annual membership $3,000
  • Annual Membership billed monthly $250/mo
Initial lab panel plus provider evaluation is $350, billed separately. The first consultation is complimentary.
What "included" actually means

If it's part of your hormone care, it's in the price.

Your visits

Real appointments with a clinician, not a fifteen-minute checkbox.

Your labs

Comprehensive panels — not a single hormone level. Drawn near your house.

Your medication

Shipped to your door. No pharmacy counter, no waiting.

Every supply

Syringes, alcohol pads, sharps container. All of it, in the box.

Dose adjustments

As many as it takes. We don't charge you to get it right.

Direct access

You message a clinician. Not a portal, not a call center.

A superbill, every visit

Submit it yourself toward your out-of-network deductible.

Member pricing

25% off weight-loss and peptide programs, and off practitioner-grade supplements.

Three promises

What we'll stand behind, in writing.

We won’t promise you how you’ll feel — nobody honest can. These are promises about how we practice.

The No-Treatment Promise

You will never be charged a membership fee until you and I have looked at your labs together and agreed there’s something worth treating. If there isn’t, I’ll tell you so.

The Dose-In Guarantee

We don’t guess at your dose. We recheck your labs at six weeks — and if you’re not in your target range, we adjust and recheck again at no additional charge until you are.

The One-Business-Day Rule

Message us and you hear back from a clinician — not a portal, not a chatbot, not a call center — within one business day.
No mystery

What actually happens, and when.

Most people are starting treatment inside two to three weeks. Here’s the whole thing.
This week

A free consult

A real conversation about your symptoms, your history, what you’ve already tried, and what you actually want. You won’t be charged and you won’t be sold.
Within a few days

Labs, near your house

We send an order to a draw station close to you. Ten minutes. You never drive to a clinic to get stuck with a needle.
3–5 business days

Your results, explained

We go through your actual numbers together — what’s normal, what isn’t, and what it means. If treatment isn’t appropriate, that’s what you’ll hear.
Days after that

Medication at your door

Everything you need arrives in one box, with instructions from your clinician rather than a pamphlet.
Week six

We check our work

Repeat labs and a visit to confirm you’re responding and fine-tune the dose. This is the step most clinics skip.
Straight talk

This isn't right for everybody.

  • If you want testosterone without labs, we're not the clinic for you.
  • If you want a number on a screen and no monitoring afterward, we're not it either.
  • If you live outside Texas, we can't legally treat you — and we'll tell you that on the first call, not the third.
  • If your real problem turns out to be sleep apnea, your thyroid, or five hours of sleep a night, we'll say so and treat that instead.

Saying yes to everyone would be the easy business. It’s just not good medicine.

Before you book

The questions we actually get.

Insurance pays for fifteen-minute visits and denies the labs we actually need. Billing it would mean seeing three times the patients for half the time each. We’d rather charge you directly, give you the time, and tell you your price before you start. We give you a superbill for every visit so you can submit it toward your out-of-network deductible.

Most patients can. Your plan administrator makes the final call, and the superbill is what they’ll want to see. Worth asking before you assume you can’t.

No. There’s no contract on either path and nothing auto-renews on HOOT 90. We’d rather you stay because it’s working than because you’re stuck.

Most patients do, with an insulin-sized needle, once or twice a week. It takes about fifteen seconds. There are other delivery methods and we’ll talk through them. Almost nobody who was nervous about it is still nervous by week three.

Then you don’t start, and you won’t be charged a membership fee. You’ll pay for the lab panel and you’ll leave knowing what’s actually going on — which is worth something on its own.

No. Everything is telehealth. Labs are drawn near you, visits are on video, and medication ships to your door — anywhere in Texas.

Ready when you are

Talk to a clinician. You won't be charged, and you won't be sold.

If you’re in Texas and you’d like us to look at your symptoms, your history, and your labs with you, the first conversation is free.
Book a free consultation
Joe Hamm, PA-C · John M. Cash, MD · Licensed in Texas · (210) 990-8180
HOOT HRT is a cash-pay telehealth hormone clinic providing testosterone replacement therapy, hormone replacement therapy, and metabolic health services to patients located in Texas, where our clinicians are licensed and telehealth is legally permitted.
The information on this page is for educational purposes only and does not constitute medical advice. All treatment decisions are made by licensed clinicians based on individual clinical assessment, lab results, and established medical guidelines. Results vary and no specific outcome is guaranteed. Some treatment protocols may include compounded medications where clinically appropriate and legally available; compounded medications are not FDA-approved drug products.